Day 334

i am not
a fighter
or a liker of
conflict
but it
is life and
like life
and my
place in it,
I am forced
to experience
it.

Day 333

I'm only half-evil
see, I'm only half
like Diet Dr. Pepper
or a white rapper.
I'm only 50% good
like a politician.
I'm only 50% evil, though
like a sixth grader
But
I'm 100% me.

Day 332

with words like masterpieces
i bled
unto pages
people crumpled
my heart breaking before my eyes
in a ball
no one reads

but I always stoop to pick it up
dust it off
uncrinkle my bleeding work
and start over.

Day 331

Night air
opens my preverbial third eye
in the darkness
my eye flickering
to a bicycle
lingering under a lamp...

Day 330

You know,
sometimes it's your friends that matter most.

(thanks Kevin for the awesome photo bomb blur thing.... >.<

Day 329

Away
is hard for me
when you are

the one
I'm away from.

Day 328

I can feel
and sometimes
I wish I couldn't
because pain and anger
and frustration and betrayal
and hopelessness and anxiety...
sometimes makes me feel
it isn't worth it to feel
but then
there's
love.

Day 327

All these thoughts
All these deadlines
All these ideas
All these lines
All these concepts
All these messed up things I should be able to define....

are running through my head
and I can't stop to catch them.

Day 326

in the corners of your mind
in the shadows
creases of your life
are hidden, tucked away
and its odd
because another type of person
lies there.

Day 325

No you don't know
so don't pretend you do
just be quiet for once
and listen.
sometimes
words just aren't enough.
you should know that
better than anyone.

Day 324

It's the little things in my life
that keep me entertained
and it's the people I love
and who love me
that keep me happy.

Day 323

teardrops
rain
feeling
harsh
winter
snow
frozen
teardrops

Day 322

Beautiful fall day
makes all my cares
fly far away....

Day 321

Why, of course
if I can
I'll help save a life
and do everything I can
to help.
I'm not the doctors who operate
or the nurses who assist
but I will still help as much as I can.

It doesn't cost anything?
They give you things for showing up?
You feel awesome for helping?
Sure I'll donate my blood
You don't even need to ask.

Day 320

45
is the number of days I have
until I start over
start again
end this chapter
and begin another
another chapter
that may or may not involve
you
or
this
goddamn
blog.

Day 319

i am rustling trees
auburn leaves
whipping wind
sweatshirts zipped up tight
warm and coozy
i am fall.

Day 318

I don't know where my life is going to lead
I don't know what will happen
I don't know who I'll meet
I don't know what I'll say
I don't know what my life is going to be like
But with you by my side
It doesn't matter.

Day 317

The weary rainy wind
soaks me to the skin again.
My clothes hang heavy with the rain
dragging both my body
and spirits
down again.

Day 316

Time Capsule
yesterday I opened up a time capsule
I had put away in 2000
when I was nine years old
and had to do it for some sort of project.
expecting to find shiny things,
I was shocked to find that
even as a child
I was introspective
and still want many of the same things
I wanted back then...

A lanyard from camp
A pokemon card
A pickachu keychain
A catdog keychain
pictures from when I was much younger
A receipt for gas (1.39 a gallon)
'2000' glasses, (after celebrating the millenium)
Notes about my favorite things
Ideas about the future
Memories
An autobiography


And I sound the same
but at the same time,
different.

Day 315

syrup like maple candy
sticks but flows through my fingers
green around the edges
brown inside
honey nectar
sweet to taste
but bitter when it hardens.

Day 314

There are so many things
I cannot do in this world.
I can't be a supermodel
a skateboarder, a doctor,
a biologist
but I can be
a great person
a daughter
a passionate person
a writer.

Day 313

Memories flood back
across my mind
like long-forgotten friends
trinkets to remind me
about the past
and how I want to live
in the future.

Day 312

It's nice and warm
in all the small places
and corner
of home.

Day 311

the shadows followed her
on the back alleys and
crested tops of buildings.
Her breath hurried, she had no
choice but to run. And she
did. She spread out her legs and
feet and pushed off, as if she
had been born with wings.
They couldn't carry her far, just
enough to move her forward.

Day 310

Words upon lips
hit pavement with a sledgehammer
ideas bubble from liquid truth
splashing the heels of people walking by.
They'll wipe it off
burn pieces of expression
but hide from it in the flames
afraid of the spark
seen in the other's eyes
afraid of truly burning.

Day 309

Do you see me for who I am
And what I want to be?
Do you see past my expression
To see what I'm thinking?
Are you thinking
What I'm thinking?
It would be nice to know
Every now and then.

Day 308

looking up
watermelon slices fall
gaping mouthes
but I laugh and
take the long way around
rejoicing in
the blankets around me

you know its a good day
when you've got ink on your fingers.

Day 307

faces fall at sight
reality crashes rain
falls dark clouds
gather rumbling
threatening the
light of day
to destroy
and not create.

Day 306

Stare
is all I do
because how can I
show you how often
I'm thinking of you.
So close
yet so far away from me...
It hurts me.

Day 305

Golden
means valuable
it means
rock hard
foundation
to base yourself
and also
wisdom and compassion
aged
with time.

Day 304

I cannot imagine
what you think
in the darkness
as you lay there
what goes on in there
I wonder
but you smile
and I know
it's going to be alright.