Day 62

Faith

It's time...
The spark that ignites how I think
And how I feel
Struck me unexpected
And opened the emptiness
That I didn't know existed.
Something lost
Something that needs be regained.
If not for anyone else
It needs to be for me.
I don't want to feel empty
Anymore...

Day 61

Word Association Lesson #1

French fry
oil
fish 'n' chips
Britian
Beatles
John Lennon
chocolate cake in a bag
Waldorf Hotel
Serendipity
John Cusak
In Your Eyes
Peter Gabriel
80's
Breakfast Club
Judd Nelson
corny music
Chuck sneakers.

Day 60

Sixty days

Sixty days down and the world keeps spinning round...
For once in my life
I'm consistent, well, at least in this.
Sixty solid days of introspection
Sixty days of poetry.
The written word
is alive again in the pages.

Only three hundred more to go.

Day 59

Words...

Words stick
like maple syrup to a high school lunch table.
Spoken aloud
words are like daggers that cut deeper with every word.
Words burn
like acid in the stomach, churning, designed to hurt.
Words are painful
like having to wait, or watch, unable to do anything.
Stick.
Burn.
Painful.
Words hurt.

Day 58

Destination Unknown

Running river...
water...
rushing rushing through
over rocks and boulders
towards a destination unknown
not stopping
like small streams
fish know where to go
and follow the current
towards...
destination unknown.

Day 57

There's something better
Always something better
Gotta keep looking
It's out there
Somewhere...
And it's going to be mine.

Day 56

Dripping from pores
of my being
the thought process not only eats at my flesh
it tears at my soul.

I would give it up
If I could
To stop thinking sometimes
and just be....

Day 55

Waiting
Waiting always waiting.
Don't waste my time...
precious as it is.
Can't act like I've got something to do
While I wait for you.

Day 54

The Simple Things

A cool, un-opened can of Mt. Dew
My favorite green blanket
Fluffy slippers
A bag of cheese curls
My laptop
Shelves of dog-eared books
Hot chocolate radiating heat
A comfy, well-worn couch for me to lay on.

Day 53

(Untitled)

I've got a blanket wrapped around me
Shut out from the cold world
Yet I let the breeze in
So I remember what it feels like
To be alive.
Never drink coffee
And not really tea
But this can of coke always does the trick
In getting me into a mood
I'll never regret.

Just relaxing in some spare time
It's what I really need to unwind.

Day 52

Thursday

Wake up in the morning
Feeling like Ben Balutis.
;)
I'm never hitting the gym again.
Got the chills, but I'm still awake
Stretching out my legs.
With a foot on the floor
The others already out the door.
Sneak around the sleeping roommate
Hopefully make class on time.
Another day
Another moment in time.

Day 51

can't you see

crime. hatred. depression. disgusting. death. it's all around us.
turn around to see the cling.
shadows. on. the. wall.
etching death. etching time.
caught. in. a. cycle.
unmoving.

break....
free....
break.free.
Break. Free.
Or fake it till you make it.
Do what you do
And do it well.

Day 50

Back

I'm back
To the hustle and bustle of the concrete jungle.
In between crowds of wild college kids
Grinning slightly as new students barely make it to class.
Some slumped into desks
Only there because they have to be,
Last night's party still evident on their faces.
Back to the wide, scary place that is college.
An entire eco-system, a world that goes on
Interrupted by only mild breaks
The cater to the people within it.

Day 49

For Real

Sitting around
Wasting time.
Is this the purpose of my life?
Well then...
The purpose of life seems meaningless
When I can't be who I want to be.
Family is first
Friends are amazing
Learning sometimes can be exciting

But the more I think
The more I want to experience life
For real.

Day 48

I'm probably going to offend you.

This is just me.
I mean what I say
And I say what I mean.
I'm not going to sugarcoat it
Just to make you feel better.
If it needs to be said
I'll say it.
If I want it a secret
I won't hint at it.
I don't want to be mean
But I don't want to be fake.
I know what I believe
And you can't change me
No matter what you think
Or what you believe.
This doesn't mean I'll ignore you
But it doesn't mean I'll join you.

Day 47

Free association

falls from my lips
like randomly tapped keys on my keyboard.

Peaches and branches
In summer
Hot and sticky
Cool wind through the air
Chlorine
Lemonade
Strawberry shortcake
Dog kisses
Grass between toes
Sand between toes
90's summer music
Bonfires as the sun goes down
Sunburns
Watermelon....

Day 46

On the road
a weary traveler of sorts
stopping only to smile and spend some time with strangers.
On the road
with no one looking over their shoulder
they can tramp the path they choose.
On the road
not looking back at the past
in an attempt to pave a new future.
It's only on the road
does the weary traveler realize
that they are truly alone.

Day 45

(Untitled)

The spaces in between knowing
Etch in shadows and curl around the corners
Just an inch out of reach.
Shadows fall like soldiers
Vanishing into the ground
Muddy and battered
Crest-fallen faces with stone hearts
In a doomed military line.
Slowly but surely
The shadows end
Never exactly the same
As the first time.

Day 44

Merry-Go Round

Round and round and round
Whirls of color
Whirls of sound.
Horses stretched outwards
Dragons, zebras, mythical creatures
Captured in mid-gallop.
In an eternal gasp
Frozen in place.
Whirling and twirling around
With its mix of childhood music
Mixed with laughter and yelling
A carnival atmosphere.

Day 43

No.
I will not write a poem today.
I don’t feel okay.
I don’t feel happy.
I don’t feel sad.
I’m not going to comment on the weather
Or about a love story I once heard.
There is no change in my life.
I haven’t done anything new.
I haven’t re-done anything old.
So…
What would I write about?

Day 42

Done.

Put the finishing period at the end
A couple backstrokes for good measure.
The end of ideas
Words finalized in print.
Done.
The story lays out before you.
Your ideas, your characters, your scene
Done.
As if it were never JUST a thought
It becomes as concrete as the words themselves.
Laid out before you.

Day 41

"There are no coincidences." -Sigmund Freud


I saw you standing there
You were running your fingers through your hair
But you didn't see me.
Why were you here
After months of heartbreak
Why would I run into you
When we are so far apart.

Walking towards you
Stopped in my tracks
By the person next to you.

It all made sense.

You never told me.
You never bothered to care.
We were always friends
Why didn't you trust me
Why don't you think that I would care?

Day 40

Sneezing with a sour throat
In absolute agony
Coughing and wheezing
Kicking and wishing I felt better.


Ugh...I feel horrible.

Day 39

Bad Dreams

The worst movies I've ever seen
Were nothing like any bad dream.
Woken by shivers, woken by falling
Woken by spiders, woken by drowning,
I wake unaware, unconscience and confused
After a restless night that I did not choose.
Alone in the dead of night
Without anyone or anything to show the light.
Was it a dream
Or was it a mysterious plan?
My mind's way of telling me of that mysterious man....

Day 38

I don't know you
I don't know who you are
I don't know what you've been through
I don't know your parents
Your family
Your friends
I don't know what you want
What you dream about
What you hope to be.

All I know
Is that deep down
We are all the same.

Day 37

Pookie Bear

Warm fuzzy fur
Hides a little hamster
Snuggly and squirming.
Pink little nose
Twitches in delight
At sunflower seeds.
A little bundle of fur
Full of love.
Poking his little head out
Only to see what makes loud sounds
And to eat.
A little lazy and cuddly.
I wouldn't have it any other way.

Day 36

Buttons buttons buttons

Day 35

Desert Dreams

The heat boils down
Torching sand and soil
Boils and burns the skin.
Small lizards scurry across the sand
Not stopping to let the sun win
Searching for small pools of life-saving water.

But at night....
The desert night becomes a desert dream.
Air cools to chill the skin
Bonfires curl up to the sky
Illuminating the pitch black night
Dancing wildly around the flames.
Horses running through the sand
Their shapes free-flowing and forming again
Echoing hoof-beats trump the air
As the beating of young lovers hearts
Join in the wild roar of the wild
Yelling to the mountains
Joining the coyotes
In a primordial yell of freedom and of night.

Day 34

Yes.
Absolutely.
Without a doubt.
With certainty.
Possibly.
Maybe.
Never.
In a blue moon.
No.
Why?
Because.
Why?
It is the way it is.
Why?
Leave me alone.

Day 33

Wind

I wonder why it is the way it is
But then again
I'm like the wind.
If I never stay too long
If I never linger
I will never have to feel the pain
Feel the anxious looks
Feel regret at things done
Even feel close to others
If I pull away and drift through.
Wind is majestic enough..
I could be wind.
It runs power, it blows through trees
It is responsible for many things.

But wind doesn't have anywhere to go when the day is done.
It is alone.
I couldn't be wind.

Day 32

2010

So, a new year is here. I don't feel any different...maybe a little tired, but not really any different. I suppose my obligatory resolution is a continuation of ideals I've gradually come to accept. Resolutions for everyone are primarily almost all the same and involve improving oneself in the years to come. I wonder if our ancestors thought it necessary to do the same things...

My life is great, I can't complain. There are definitely some things I would like to change and aspects of my life that I wouldn't wish on anyone, but I can't say I'm unhappy.

Breathe in the good. Breathe out the bad. Reflect, but take time to relax and spend some "me" time. Everything will happen in due time. Everything happens for a reason.

I would like to hope this year is a better one. So, here's to a better year!